On being a smartass
Do you know these guys who always insist to their opinion? Who doesn’t stop talking? Who always want to be right?
I got this a lot. People telling me I’m a smartass.
Am I? Let me explain my point of view. Because I want to convince you and be right. Just kidding…
It’s not that I just want to be right. OK, maybe when I was younger I wanted to.
I just don’t change my mind quickly. Why? When I’m forming an opinion I think it through. I don’t adopt other option easily. Other do it all the time — I constantly see this. They read or hear something and think it’s true. Then they tell this to other people. I take my time to form my opinion.
But if I do there are good reasons why. Afterward, there have to be good reasons I change it again. It’s the same in science. You build a hypothesis and try to prove it. If there is proof you might end up with a theory. If it’s a good theory you properly stay with it for some time. You won’t change it just because someone else has a new idea or hypothesis. No, you need proof again. You need proof that a new theory might be better than your old one.
No matter how convinced you are about something I have to make up my own mind. I want to make sure are not just telling bullshit, therefore I ask questions. I doubt your idea first. Sometimes a lot. This might be exhausting. This is how I like it to be. First, I have to be convinced. I have to experience it.
However, this doesn’t mean I don’t consider the other opinion. Actually, I’m fully aware, sometimes it’s not about clarifying who’s idea is more practical. Sometimes you just want to share different opinion and don’t discuss them.
You might see it’s not my intention to insist on my opinion. I just want to make sure it’s worth changing my opinion.
Here is an example. I love cooking. Being in the kitchen and prefer delicious food — and eat it afterward. Ofter the years I learned a lot how to do some things. They are just ways to do something whereby to food tasks better. Like many spices taste better and different gently roasted. When someone is putting them raw on their meals I’d like to share my opinion. They might miss some great and delicious experience.
When I was preparing food with a friend of mine, she was cutting the peppers in a completely different way I do. I looked at it, tried it myself and was immediately convinced. Since then I always cutting peppers this way. This way you don’t have to deal with all the little annoying seeds. Every time I see someone cutting peppers a different way I just want to share the other way. Maybe he really likes this one, too. I don’t care who’s right. Can there even be a right way to cut peppers?
Anyway, I get it. Sometimes — I guess most of the time — people just don’t care like I do. They just want to do it their way. However, they might keep complaining I’m insisting on doing it my way.
Another short story. This happened just recently.
I bought a camping mat some time ago. Therefore, I researched which one would fit my needs and might be the best choices. I researched a lot because I wanted to make a good choice.
When a friend wanted to buy one she asks me. I told her which I bought and why. Also, I pointed out why these others aren’t as good as mine — at least in mine opinion of course.
She bought a different one. In her opinion, hers is much better and would fit her need much better. I still thought differently and wasn’t convinced. No surprise, she was telling me that I’m always insisting on my opinion.
I don’t care which camping mat she was buying but fine. If she has a different opinion I let her stick with it. I stick with mine. So far so good. There is a funny ending to this. This was some month ago. Since then she told severals time how good her mat is. Good for her.
Recently we were camping together. One morning I come into our tent finding her sleeping on my mat. OK. Wasn’t saying anything to this. The next morning the same. This continues for several days. Actually, I didn’t care.
But then she tells me mine is much more comfortable and you aren’t slipping as easily. Oh really, it is? No one would have expected that.
I don’t care if I was right. People can change their mind. Learning through experience. You know what? This happens quite often. Frequently I experience my idea wasn’t that bad. So why should I change it?
Indeed, I don’t change my opinion quickly. I have good reasons for.
That’s said, I guess I sound like a smartass. I’m fine with that. Are you?